My Three Fathers: A Memoir [9798897400287]

Overview

A memoir of reckoning, forgiveness, and the fragile work of choosing what to carry forward.

My Three Fathers follows a ten-year journey of discovery as Jamie questions her choices in life and in men. She patches together the origins of those choices through reconnecting with her three fathers: her biological father, a Cuban exile, her Cherokee-Jewish stepfather, and later, her Iranian stepfather.

The story starts in girlhood and interweaves with her early marriage years—and the question of what led her to marry so young and to the wrong man. When she begins to get to know her biological father, a Cuban exile living on an old wooden yacht, she grapples with understanding her own identity in relationship to men, and ultimately, apart from men.

As she dismantles the mythologies she has held and carried most her life about her father, herself, and her relationship to and with men, she recognizes patterns she has recreated in her life, including a sense of loss and abandonment for her sons, even though all she ever wanted was to create a sense of stability for them that she never had. As she reconciles with each father, she learns eventually to open up, to soften her heart, and to advocate for herself.